Of Fog and Fear

"Surely, I am with you always, even to the end of the age." Matthew 28:20

Wednesday was spent packing up, sending emails back and forth to Beijing in an effort to clarify schedules, as well as hotel and airport pick ups. I confess, I will not be sad to leave the "scene of the crime."

Everyday, in fact several times a day, we walk or ride past the place of peril. I can hardly look up in the taxi cabs taking us from Point A to Point B, without gasping at the pedestrians walking brazenly into the oncoming traffic. Not to mention the thousands of cyclists and motor bikes that crisscross through the cars without a care or concern for safety. Admittedly, the brakes on the vehicles are not tapped too often as the cars find a way to negotiate the chaos carefully. It does not make my nerves any less frayed.

D and I ran a few errands and made our way to the hospital, BA was sitting up on the side of the bed, conversing with her ever-rotating number of Chinese visitors. Physically, she has improved faster and better than expected - emotionally is another story. The reality of the wait, the location, the actual circumstances of being stuck are taking their toll. When certain things are said (or thought through by following the train of suggested utterance) tears find their home in all of our eyes. When the night "servant" arrived J, D and I said our "goodbyes and get betters".

I am fighting the fear and trying to forget the events of what seems like an eternity ago. Last week we were enjoying the celebration and the circumstance of what brought me to China. This week there is an entirely new set of circumstances and hardly cause for celebration.

This morning I woke before the construction started (4:30 am) or perhaps it had only stopped temporarily. I looked out across the campus from the hotel window and thankfully the fog did not seem near as dense as in years past. I am hopeful the plane will depart on time and my arrival in Beijing will be on schedule. C will be waiting to meet me and assist in the transportation to the hotel.

No life circumstance or weather anomaly is out of His control or dominion. I pray as I leave the fogged in city of Jinan, my heart, soul and spirit will clear. The good fight will be fought in a new city (on a different front) and I will finish the race.


"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9

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